Little Red Riding Hood

I wrote a note to my grandma, apologizing for leaving quickly after the conclusion of the awards. I have always thought she was a cold person, and have never been close to her. This confirms my suspicion that she knows nothing about me or my situation, and may not even care. Following is my e-mail to her and her response to me.

My e-mail to her:
Subject: Thank You
Body:
Hi Grandma,

Thank you so much for having a place for me and Steve at the Crystal Heart Awards. I have always enjoyed going to the awards, and this year was the best so far. Steve and I were impressed by several of the trailers and hope to see the movies at some point. I wanted to mention that I'm sorry I left quickly at the conclusion of the awards. I was a little surprised by my dad's choice in seating arrangements, and felt too upset to stay and talk with everyone. Normally, that's the part I like best, seeing people I don't normally get to see. I was sorry to miss out on that.

The evening was so lovely, and is always so heartwarming. Film has been an important part of my life, and I think it is important to honor movies that uplift and give hope. I'm glad you're a part of the festival and have helped make it a big part of Indianapolis culture.

Love,
Lauren

Her Response:
Subject: RE: Thank You
Body:
You shouldn't be upset with your Dad on seating arrangements.....those were mine. I made the assumption that since you had clicked with all the gals this summer, that you would enjoy being at a table with them and that gave me a chance to put two celebrities at their table.....which I like to do for Heartland as a member of their Govenor's Board. There were no politics in that seating arrangement that didn't come from me and those were with good intentions! It was an "all granddaughter arrangement" in my mind, and since you saw family all the time, and Idonna wasn't always your favorite, that it was a good idea. I sat away from my husband to be a better hostess to friends......it wasn't about me or you......it was about enjoying the tickets and the evening.

And a second e-mail:
Guess I should clarify that your Dad did not purchase a table.....we bought 4 tables at $200 a head and I had the task of arranging the seating and trying to also fulfill my obligations as a Board of Governor's person to have donated seats for celebrities at each table. I made those choices. That was 40 people to consider.

And Grandmotherly advice ahead: ......a lesson I learned in life was that when you are in a group setting you should develop a "group setting mind-set" which uses the universal rule......"what would it be like if everyone in the group did a particular behavior".....if it doesn't pass muster, then you adopt what would be O.K. for all if everyone did it. We have traveled with large groups numerous times and seems there is always one or two that cannot think beyond the end of their own noses, and don't show up on time, or demand special "circumstances", etc. They always "tell on themselves" and quickly are spotted. I always feel for the persons in charge of herding the group to and from the various buses, planes, etc. as those few dominate to the disadvantage of the big picture. And I feel the saddest for the ones that cannot seem to be part of a group......as know the rest of their lives must also be more problematic than needs be. Life is tough enough on it's own, so I try to make my thoughts and actions leave room for the benefit of the doubt, and take the high road. Over a life span, it makes a BIG difference! Don't "find" problems.......enough of them will find you all on their own.

When the kids were little and we would all go on vacations together.....I watched a transformation happen! All of us were of the mind-set that "I was on MY vacation and everything should center about how I want to spend MY vacation". (myself included). Well....we learned that 6 people cannot think that way because it was not-fun for anyone....as 6 people with their noses out of joint were not compatible. So....we had discussions about developing the group mind-set when it is indeed a group.......and we ALL had a better time.

Guess you know we love you, love you, love you.......as does your Dad. And no.....I am not sharing these things with your Dad.